ALL THE YOUNG MEN by Ruth Coker Burks and Kevin Carr O'Leary

 I was in my early 20s when the Aids epidemic exploded into the world, decimating, mostly, the male gay population, but also many many recipients of blood transfusions. All innocent in being infected with the HIV virus, but subject to the most appalling discrimination, abuse, vitriol, hate, disownment, exclusion by medical professionals, employers, funeral homes, churches, schools, child care centres, neighbours, friends, and families. Fortunately, here in NZ, I don't recall this degree of hate and discrimination towards people with HIV/Aids. I worked for an organisation with a high proportion of gay men also employed, and over the years saw their numbers drop. I remember feeling very sad when I heard that identical twin brothers, one of whom worked where I did, had died. Imagine being their parents. 

In the conservative and staunchly religious parts of the world, the treatment meted out to Aids patients was a terrible thing to see. Fear of course was driving much of the behaviour and attitudes, as was shame - being gay not considered natural, normal, permitted. HIV being a seen as a 'serves you right' disease. In the states of the American south, these attitudes were far too prevalent. It took a young single mother, Ruth Coker Burks, a woman with an extraordinary level of compassion, courage and balls to challenge the community she had lived all her life in and give these men dignity and love in their dying days. The more involved she got, the more of a crusade and his life's work this became. Her decisions around caring for and helping these abandoned men forced her to make some tough life decisions regarding her own life and that of her daughter. She could have had her child taken off her because of the work she was doing, she had no money, hardly any job, yet she kept going and going, her goal to help those less fortunate than herself. 

You can Wikipedia her, she is still doing great things in the community she lives in, and passed her own courage onto her now adult daughter and grandchildren. What a legacy to leave to the world.  I love to think that how this is written is exactly how Ms Burks speaks and goes about her daily life. A marvellous woman, funny too, fearless. For 10 years she cared for and buried Aids patients, only relinquishing this part of her life as medical and palliative care as well as social attitudes, improved for such patients.